Stupid Mario Kart: Transcription

STUPID MARIO BROTHERS – EPISODE ELEVEN TRANSCRIPT

{Voice Over, accompanied by the title screen music from Super Mario 64}

Mario and Luigi: Stupid Mario Brothers!

Mario: Episode 11!

{Mario and Luigi drive their go-kart out of their property, accompanied by the Queen song, You're My Best Friend. The two laugh together in joy.}

♫Ooh, you make me live♫

♫Whatever this world can give to me♫

♫It's you, you're all I see♫

♫Ooh, you make me live now honey♫

♫Ooh, you make me live♫

{At the end of the driveway, Mario and Luigi pause. The song fades out as a familiar theme settles in. Wario and Waluigi, atop their own go-kart pull up beside the Mario Bros. while snickering to themselves. The two parties exchange hard looks.}

{As a Mario Kart series countdown sound effect plays, a race begins, and a high tempo electric guitar piece starts up. Zooming down the hill and past the mailbox, the opposing racers curse at and demean each other before Luigi pulls out a banana, takes a few bites, then tosses the rest at Wario and Waluigi's kart, causing it to steer out of control, throwing Waluigi off the vehicle. Wario retaliates by casting Fireballs at the Mario Bros. Mario and Luigi avoid one, but Luigi is then struck by another, hurling him off the kart onto the side of the road. Wario gestures a thumbs up in approval. The two racers continue down the street, exchanging glares.}

Wario: Weh! You suck, Mario!

{At the end of the street, Mario and Wario turn their karts around. Wario takes the lead.}

Wario: Weh!

{Mario regains the lead, laughing at Wario, but then turns around, noticing an obstacle in front of him, and screams. Wario laughs, but forgets to pay attention to the road and begins screaming as well. Off screen, exaggerated tire screeching and explosion sound effects. It is shown that Mario and Wario, dazed and confused, have both crashed into the mailbox. The two get off of their crashed vehicles, furious at each other.}

Wario: Oh, my back!

{Mario and Wario exchange more glares and prepare to fight, but Mario decides it's not worth it and walks away. Wario is about to launch a Fireball at Mario, but a hand rests itself on Wario's shoulder. Wario turns around to see Donkey Kong. Wario screams and runs off while the gorilla gives chase, and the episode concludes as the Richalvarez channel URL appears. Bloopers continue the video.}

{During filming, Wario and Waluigi's go-kart stalls}

Tim Runyan: Guys, what's going on?

Matt Provencal: It died!

{Matt holds up the camera to himself}

Matt Provencal: I roll with gangs, and my quad's a piece-a shit. All you gotta know.

{Doug and Matt prepare for the banana peel shot.}}

Richard Alvarez: -and uh, action!

Matt Provencal: Hold on a second, you ass!

{Tim Runyan walks past in the Donkey Kong costume, holding its mask}

Richard Alvarez: DK, Donkey Kong.

Tim Runyan: Errr!!!

{Richard and Matt repeatedly flub Mario and Wario's dramatic face off shot}

Richard Alvarez: Oh, Sorry. It's too si-

Richard Alvarez: I think-

Richard Alvarez: Just-