|Stupid Mario Brothers|
|Season 5, Episode 63|
|Air date||February 27, 2012|
|Written by||Rich Alvarez|
|Directed by||Rich Alvarez|
"32 bit stealth training"
"Shadow Scum VS Ganon....Or Ganondorf...Whatever his name is!"
One day, the Darkness is meditating in the woods when he is approached by the General, who informs him that large legion of ninjas is headed for their direction. The Darkness orders him to rally their troops and prepare for an attack. The General then leaves to do so. The Darkness then calls on Ken, telling him he knows what to do. Ken concurs then heads off. The Darkness laughs to himself, saying that he won't be beaten so easily.
Mario, Luigi, Donkey Kong, and Ness are in the backyard awaiting Yoshi's return. Yoshi arrives and gives his report to Donkey Kong, who is then translated by Ness. However, Mario deems this translation pointless, as he can understand Yoshi. Yoshi tells Mario that many of their enemies are at the Legion of Villains' base and they are anticipating their ambush. Mario insist that they stick to the plan anyway and has the others rally the group for his inspirational speech. Brock, Gary, Wario, Mona and Ryu join them and Mario declares that, today, they are fighting to preserve their right to live free and be happy in all worlds, and that their victory today would rid the world of all evil forever. Today, they are proving that they are capable of fighting the unbelievably powerful dark forces that threaten the world. Mario's speech inspires the whole group and they declare their intentions to battle (Wario a little too much). Just then, Mario realizes that Snake missed his entire speech while he, according to Gary, was pooping.
The Darkness, Ken, and the General walk onto the battlefield, where they are confronted by Zubashi and his legion of ninjas, here to make sure that they get wiped out. The Darkness replies that he isn't as weak as Ganon thinks he is. Zubashi declares that his victory is assured because he has the ninjas. However, the Darkness calls on his army, which consists of pirates, much to Zubashi's shock. However, he insists on taking them on anyway, ordering the ninjas to attack. The pirates are given the same order by the General. The Darkness tells Ken to give Zubashi a "warm welcome", then smiles, saying the real game of Pirates vs. Ninjas has begun.
UPS is on his way to deliver Luigi's flash drive to Professor Oak when he is stopped by FedEx and a group of ninjas. FedEx orders UPS to relinquish the Mario Bros' parcel. UPS isn't intimidated and calls the ninjas "Halloween costumed freaks", hurting their feelings. FedEx tries to convince him, but UPS ignores him and leaves on his way. FedEx then tells UPS that Ace of Base sucks, greatly provoking him. FedEx challenges a furious UPS, only to have him take out all of the ninjas in the blink of an eye and then takes down FedEx for good. He says: Just no skill before leaving.
Back on the battlefield, the Darkness comments on the two rules of pirates whilst the pirates successfully overpower the ninjas and surround Zubashi. Zubashi declares that this isn't the end and that they'll be back, only to get knocked out by Ken. The Darkness commends him, then the General shoots the remaining ninjas dead on Darkness' order, with the exception of a tall one, whom the Darkness orders Ken to follow back to the League's base.
Back at their base, the Legion of Villains anxiously awaits the Mushroom Force's arrival. The force arrives just as Ganon anticipated, ready for battle. Mario declares Ganon outlawed from the planet, a declaration, which only gives rise to a great deal of laughter from the Legion of Villains. Ganon mocks Mario, saying that surely isn't the best he can do. Pauline then addresses Mario, intent on getting revenge on him for her horrific death. Scott Masterson addresses Donkey Kong, desiring revenge on him for stealing his band. Donkey doesn't seem to remember this (as it happened in the Lost Episode), but Scott doesn't believe him. Bowser questions whether Luigi is ready for this battle, to which Luigi insists that he is. Nox Decious tells Wario that he's going to pay for betraying him. Blaire Vherestorm remarks on the return of Snake's (who suddenly appears behind Ness) youthful appearance, but tells him he will be looking worse when he is done with him. Ganon silences his "children", then suggests that they get started. Mario concurs and Ganon replies with "Well then... begin!". With Ness, Brock and Gary against the Ninjas, Snake staring with his gun loaded at Blaire, Mona facing a peeved looking Pauline, DK staring into space whilst Scott glares, Wario facing Decious, Luigi vs Bowser and Mario vs Ganon, the Mushroom Force and Legion of Bad Guys prepare to do battle.
- Rich Alvarez as Mario / Darkness / UPS
- Chris Muller as Luigi / Nox Decious / FedEx
- Matt Provencal as Wario / Donkey Kong / Ganondorf
- Kevin Chamberlain as Yoshi (as Kazumi Totaka) / General
- Austin Stevenson as Bowser / Brock / Pirate #1
- Scott Otter as Scott Masterson
- Matthew Howlett as Blaire Vherestorm
- Julian Petruzzelli as Solid Snake / Gary Oak
- Eric Porter as Ken Masters / Ninja #1 / Pirate #2
- Christian Arista as Ryu / Ninja #2 / Pirate #3
- Tim Muller as Ness / Ninja #3 / Pirate #4
- Erin Henderson as Mona / Ninja #4 / Pirate #5
- Claudia Stelmach as Pauline / Ninja #5 / Pirate #6
- Nick Lunetta as Pirate #7 /Ninja #6
- The intentions of the Legion's members are revealed.
- The Darkness' army is revealed.
- FedEx is possibly killed.
- At 2:18, Brock can be seen waving at the camera, likely poking fun at his blindness.
- Around 0:43, Donkey Kong can be seen making a hand gesture similar to a running gag in the Arthur vs. the Druids vs. the Grail trilogy.
- Mario uses the "Don't call me Surely" joke, a joke used by Leslie Nielsen in Airplane and by Wario in the bloopers in "Three Objects make a Cool Weapon" when talking to Nox Decious.
- The spot that UPS and FedEx battle at is the same place where he met with Luigi.
- The battle being between pirates and ninjas (as well as the name of this episode) is a pun on the popular Internet flash game Pirates VS. Ninjas.