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Captain Morgan
Also Known As: Captain Morgan
"Super Pirate"
Big Fat Piece of Crap
Gender: Male
Series: Stupid Mario Brothers
Oishi High School Battle
Home World: Real World
Allies: Mario
Princess Oishi Kawaii
The Darkness
Enemies: Zubashi
The Darkness (formerly)
Debut: The Business Man and The Ape
Conclusion: The Super Mario Brothers
Status: Alive (comatose)
Portrayer: Matthew Thomas Provencal
"Argh! I'd be Captain Morgan, the drunkest pirate in all the seven-and-a-half seas."
—Morgan's introduction in "The Business Man and The Ape"

Captain Morgan is the "drunkest pirate in all of the seven-and-a-half seas" and a "super pirate". He is the leader of the pirates.

Originally, Morgan was hired by the Darkness to take care of Zubashi and the ninjas as the leader of the pirates.



Morgan is known for being a drunk and is the mascot of Captain Morgan Original Spiced Rum. Not much else is known about him.

Apparently, according to Zubashi, the two were once friends, but eventually, something trivial led to them becoming enemies.

Season FiveEdit


Morgan asleep

After joining forces with the Mushroom Force, the Darkness hired Morgan to take care of the ninja leader Zubashi, so it can be presumed that the two are equal in rank. However, shortly after being introduced, he passed out drunk on the couch. Thus, Wario was sent to take care of him. ("The Business Man and The Ape")

Morgan appears to have literally drank himself into a coma as Wario has been unable to wake him up by any means. Later, Wario moves him to the garage so he could play on the Wii on the couch. ("Operation: Vherestorm") However, the Darkness has sent out for someone who claims to be an expert at waking pirates. ("It's Never a good time to ignore your girlfriend. EVER!")


The pirates enjoying a bowl of Pirate Crunch cereal

Afterwards, a group of pirates try to wake Captain Morgan, but they end up failing. This is when Pirate Crunch shows up with a box of his namesake. They then pour him a bowl of Pirate Crunch cereal and feed it to him. The cereal manages to wake Morgan up and all of the pirates enjoy a bowl of the cereal afterwards.

In the battle between the pirates and the ninjas, Morgan only stood there as the pirates made the first charge, claiming to be too tired.

Morgan using Drunken Fool

During this, he uses the Pirate Technique "Drunken Fool" to knock over several ninjas. As the battle progresses, the pirates begin to lose numbers faster than the ninjas. Eventually, it boils down to just Morgan, Zubashi, and Gangles remaining. However, when trying to use his "Super Burning Lava Hot Rum Breath" Pirate Technique, Morgan only succeeds in drinking himself into a coma again. ("The Super Mario Brothers")


Morgan's primary goal is to spend his time drinking. He is characterized by this trait and his inability to fulfill his duty.

Abilities / SkillsEdit

  • Drinking: Morgan has demonstrated that he is a fantastic drinker.
  • Pirate Techniques: Morgan is also capable of performing powerful Pirate Techniques, including Drunken Fool and Super Burning Lava Hot Rum Breath.



Coming soon!


Coming soon!


  • Captain Morgan is also the name of a character in the anime One Piece. He is a corrupt marine officer with an axe for a hand and a metal jaw.
  • In "The Business Man and The Ape," Morgan had a real fake beard and mustache, while in following episodes, they have just been drawn with black marker on his face. Rich Alvarez stated that this was because the glue was hurting Matt Provencal, Morgan's actor.
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